What causes change in your life (When I say "change", I mean change in behavior, values, morals, etc. )? Is it some life changing event? Having a near death experience? Getting married? Having a child?
All of the aforementioned things are considerable "life changing" events, and I would say that for most of them, a change on some level, would be required. Few would disagree with me that change in those circumstances is to be expected.
But what about change that isn't prompted by any significant event? What about the realization that something in your life needs to change? That's hardly a life altering realization. But then, I guess it can be.
What has prompted this line of questioning comes from the fact that I have been on this path of self improvement and I don't know of any specific event that prompted it. I haven't had a near death experience, I haven't had a child, or anything else that I would classify as "major". So why am I doing it? Am I just that critical of myself? Maybe, but I don't think it's to the extent that it would cause this kind of passion in me.
I think it's something more. I think a lot of it has to do with God. I have always asked Him to make me a tool to use for His purpose. And I've seen His hand in a lot of things I've been involved with. But I think it goes beyond that. I think it boiled down to a choice.
If you read my very first blog post, you'll get the background story of where this path started for me. But I don't think I very clearly explained why. Sure I wanted to improve myself, but I think it goes beyond that.
Looking back on my life since I was about eighteen or nineteen, I felt like something in my life wasn't quite right. I didn't feel about about myself. I didn't handle things very well emotionally. But I had never considered the possibility that maybe I could do something about it. I had adopted the defeatist mentality, that I was a victim of my emotions and there was nothing I could do about it. If I was hurt by someone, it was there fault for hurting me, and I couldn't change how they made me feel. I would get upset if someone did something I didn't like and then blame THEM for making me feel bad. It sounds really stupid to read it, but as I think about it, I did it ALL the time. Now I adopt a much different view. I am in control of my emotions. No one, and I mean NO ONE, makes me feel anything emotionally. That is a choice I make.
When you say, "Bob said something that was mean and hurtful! He made me mad!" You are really saying, Bob said some mean things, and you chose to get mad about them. Bob didn't force you to get mad. He may have wanted you to, but then maybe he didn't. What if he was trying to make you laugh? But you didn't laugh, you got mad instead. So if we are running with the idea that Bob somehow has control over how you feel, then, by that same logic, you should be laughing and not mad.
Too many times I've seen people take the victim mentality that they are victims of their environments and have no control over how it effects them. This is the biggest form of cowardice and immaturity I can possibly think of. Do we have control over what happens to us all the time? No, more often than not, we don't. But how you respond emotionally to it is completely up to you. Take some responsibility for your emotions. Quit being a victim and start controlling how you respond to the various ways life effects you.
I have much more to say on this topic... consider this the first of many posts on the subject. Take care!
All of the aforementioned things are considerable "life changing" events, and I would say that for most of them, a change on some level, would be required. Few would disagree with me that change in those circumstances is to be expected.
But what about change that isn't prompted by any significant event? What about the realization that something in your life needs to change? That's hardly a life altering realization. But then, I guess it can be.
What has prompted this line of questioning comes from the fact that I have been on this path of self improvement and I don't know of any specific event that prompted it. I haven't had a near death experience, I haven't had a child, or anything else that I would classify as "major". So why am I doing it? Am I just that critical of myself? Maybe, but I don't think it's to the extent that it would cause this kind of passion in me.
I think it's something more. I think a lot of it has to do with God. I have always asked Him to make me a tool to use for His purpose. And I've seen His hand in a lot of things I've been involved with. But I think it goes beyond that. I think it boiled down to a choice.
If you read my very first blog post, you'll get the background story of where this path started for me. But I don't think I very clearly explained why. Sure I wanted to improve myself, but I think it goes beyond that.
Looking back on my life since I was about eighteen or nineteen, I felt like something in my life wasn't quite right. I didn't feel about about myself. I didn't handle things very well emotionally. But I had never considered the possibility that maybe I could do something about it. I had adopted the defeatist mentality, that I was a victim of my emotions and there was nothing I could do about it. If I was hurt by someone, it was there fault for hurting me, and I couldn't change how they made me feel. I would get upset if someone did something I didn't like and then blame THEM for making me feel bad. It sounds really stupid to read it, but as I think about it, I did it ALL the time. Now I adopt a much different view. I am in control of my emotions. No one, and I mean NO ONE, makes me feel anything emotionally. That is a choice I make.
When you say, "Bob said something that was mean and hurtful! He made me mad!" You are really saying, Bob said some mean things, and you chose to get mad about them. Bob didn't force you to get mad. He may have wanted you to, but then maybe he didn't. What if he was trying to make you laugh? But you didn't laugh, you got mad instead. So if we are running with the idea that Bob somehow has control over how you feel, then, by that same logic, you should be laughing and not mad.
Too many times I've seen people take the victim mentality that they are victims of their environments and have no control over how it effects them. This is the biggest form of cowardice and immaturity I can possibly think of. Do we have control over what happens to us all the time? No, more often than not, we don't. But how you respond emotionally to it is completely up to you. Take some responsibility for your emotions. Quit being a victim and start controlling how you respond to the various ways life effects you.
I have much more to say on this topic... consider this the first of many posts on the subject. Take care!
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